Lady my dog

Last night was a scary night . My poor dog Lady my youngest of the bunch. I noticed she defecated on the bed and wet herself. I picked her up she was weak. I said to her don't go, in other words don't die. I held her in arms. I could not afford to go the vet. This fucking economy, I have no money. And there is no emergency services. I prayed for days, my dog is young. She seems okay, when we woke up this morning. I was obsessing about her gone. I was so afraid. It was dark at night, if she died how would I bury her. She was scared also. Poor baby. I think the tortilla soup I gave her may have caused her to get sick. I guess. I want to make it my fault. I called my sister the nurse she said that maybe it was some rat poison. I hope other people feel that way about there animals. I love her so much. She is young and sweet. I have 2 other dogs but they are much older than she. I rescued her she was at hanging out at my neighbors and they were not taking care of her well, so I paid the guy who is a alcoholic $50. She has made so happy. She is so playful. Kinda like the little girl I never had.
Other subject about last night: I had to go to bathroom every fucking hour or even sooner. I am so tired right now. I have been having this trouble with bladder for a few months. I know what the Dr. will do give me antibiotics. Its like I could treat myself if I had a prescription pad. I've had this problem before. I may need a rotor rooter done you know where. I am tired of getting old. Everything goes. I know I am whining but hey that's me.